The Professor Paradox Rough Guide to Prices

 I work very hard to try to make every show into a theatrical and artistic experience, and every performance is individually tailored to the event, so I don’t try to compete on price. The following is a very rough guide to charges for particular types of event. Please note that the prices are a guide and the price quoted will depend on audience size, time of year and how much work it is likely to be.

Travel and other expenses where appropriate are additional – see bottom of page for details

Please note that all bookings are subject to the terms and conditions

Children’s Birthday Parties

Parties start at £140 plus travel for a show lasting about an hour*. Dates in the summer may be a bit more, particularly at weekends, and December is usually a lot more. See below for details of travel costs.

Coming Soon – January discount – yes it’s that time of year again! For private parties at weekends, during January 2019 there is a discount of £40 off the normal price, so you can have a wonderfool party show from £100! *

*Off-Peak Midweek Discount – Up to £50 off for Private Parties!

Weekend Parties start at £140 but if you want to save money and still have a great party, then why not hold the party after school, or during half term? I’m currently offering £50 off the normal price for after school or midweek parties, so you can have a great show from £90 plus travel. Better still, team up with someone else and have a joint party and halve the cost! Compare that to taking children to one of those party play places! I’ll even barter if you have something to offer …?


1) £50 Midweek Discount applies Monday to Thursday. Friday and Easter and summer holiday discount is £25, and there is no midweek discount in December or on Bank holidays.
2) Applies to private parties only
3) The geographical range of this offer is limited – please ask for details.

* If you only want a 30 minute show I can do this but it is only £10 less than the full hour show

Playgroups and Play Schemes

Usually about the same as children’s parties depending on the size of the event, and who is providing the treasure …

Informal Public Events

Events are everything from Arts Festivals, Fetes, Family days, Fun Days and everything else in between. I work at family and child orientated events, preferably with some artistic or cultural leaning. Events that incorporate, non stop pop music, motorcycle displays, or a strong emphasis on alcohol consumption are not generally considered to be suitable. Charges are based on a day rate of £250 for three different half hour static shows, or a half day rate of £200 for two shows

Royal Occasions and Similar Events

Demand is usually very high and I have to make a living so the prices tend to be higher. I quote individually depending on the audience size, number and duration of shows etc – prices start at £200

Weddings and Other Tribal Gatherings

This category includes Weddings, Christenings, Adult Birthday Parties, and other private functions, and they fall into two categories.

I love performing in situations where the children are part of the event and everyone, including groan ups are going to join in, have a lot of fun and laugh together, and I only take bookings for this type of event.

I don’t entertain children at weddings etc in order to occupy the children while the adults are otherwise engaged with speeches or other activities.

Cost depends on the size of the event and a few other things – from £180 plus expenses is a rough guide

Corporate Events

Every event is different, but £250 is a starting point

Venues – Theatres, Village Halls Etc.

Depends a lot on the venue and the audience size. If it’s a small theatre or village hall £250 per show is a starting point, but if you are the London Palladium (some hope) then it might be a bit more …!


For general entertainment and fun its fairly flexible depending on how busy I am but from £1.50 per pupil (minimum £180) is a rough guide.

Educational shows are more due to the work and preparation involved. The science show is £280 for large schools but I do give a discount to smaller schools (minimum £180 per show). It is sometimes possible to get a grant from The Royal Institution STEM directory – details here

Christmas Parties

Sorry but late November/December is a very busy time so I concentrate on schools and other large audiences and the cost is £200 – £250 plus expenses. Usually this works out at a cost per child of an ice cream and a bag of crisps, so its not as bad as it sounds …


Travel is charged at 50p per mile to cover time and expenses, so to get an approximation use Google Maps to find the distance from the venue to TA13, then multiply the one way distance by £1.00

Overnight accommodation where necessary is additional

Please note that all bookings are subject to the terms and conditions


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